Are you there, God? It's me, Ellie
by 3rdgymbros
Summary: Are you there, God? It's me, Ellie. Today, I met the most annoying douche. Please don't make us meet again, God.
1. Ellie Dreams A Little Dream

**A/N:** Okay, so this is basically a retelling of the 2016 Deadpool movie. I know Negasonic Teenage Warhead had her own powers in the movie, but I was wondering what would have happened if she had her _original_ powers - telepathy and precognition. Also, I thought it would be funnier if she had one of those 'flowery' names that she absolutely hates; which was why she coined Negasonic Teenage Warhead. Hence, in this fic, Ellie's full name will be Emmeline Isadora Phimister, and she is a mutant telepath. Reviews, subscriptions and favorites are appreciated! I hope everyone enjoys the story!

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Emmeline Isadora Phimister ( known to close friends as Ellie, and called Negasonic Teenage Warhead by everyone else ) leaps sideways, but she's not strong enough to dive behind the crate in one bound. When her left shoulder erupts with pain, she muffles a scream. Her quadriceps throb as she pushes off again and sails the last meter to shelter. Spots of fire erupt down her arm; her skin is soft, supple, unable to deflect bullets like Colossus' silver skin.

Ellie lands hard, rolls like a log and cradles the useless limb to her chest. Raw pain and the coppery tang of raw flesh makes her woozy. She chomps her tongue to stay sharp. _It's not over._ Using her good arm, Ellie props herself up and peers around her place of refuge. There are a series of loud cracks, like fireworks going off. Blood sprays the floor in a soft crimson rain. Lots of limbs lie at unnatural angles.

Her eyes land on Colossus, zeroing in on the thick length of rope around his neck. He claws at the rope and the woman behind him tightens it. She hears him take a giant rasping breath, and Ellie's stomach ties itself into knots. If his skin isn't silver, Ellie is sure that his face will be turning shades of red and purple. She doesn't want Colossus to die. He doesn't deserve death, not after all he's done for her. Anger clouds her vision.

 _He needs help. I have to help him._

And then suddenly, she _is_ Colossus. She clutches at her neck with frantic fingers, lungs burning, but the rope stubbornly refuses to budge. She can't move. She can't get away. Spots dance before her eyes; her chest burns. She fights against the iron grip around her throat, needing air, desperate for air -

And then, nothing.


	2. A Regular Day at the X-Mansion

**A/N:** Chapter 2 up! I hope that everyone is enjoying the story so far!

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The sound of the alarm clock was an irritating intrusion into the comfortable haze of sleep that wrapped its arms around Ellie. She dragged her hand out from beneath the warm cocoon of blankets to hit the snooze button. She kept her eyes closed; trying to let the haze reclaim her, but the damage had already been done. She was awake now.

She sighed, still not ready to untangle herself from the covers, and she tried to recall what she had been dreaming about before being so rudely interrupted. For a moment, she thought she might remember, but the elusive whisper of her dream escaped her. She made a disgusted sound to herself as she finally threw off the blankets and sat up in one not-so-smooth motion. She turned off her clock before it could reach its nine-minute snooze interval.

She stumbled through most of her before-school routine; showering, brushing her teeth, dressing. Today, she decided on a more casual look: A black cable knit scarf wound around her neck Jimi Hendrix-style, black leather jacket, a black sweater dress, stockings with ladders in the knees and black ankle boots. After scrutinizing herself in the mirror and noting the dark circles beneath her eyes, she once again thought about how badly she wanted to crawl back beneath the mound of already cooling blankets that covered her bed like an inviting nest. She applied thick black eyeliner and three coats of mascara, as if she could make the dark bruises beneath her eyes an accessory, then painted on Wine Gum lip gloss.

First period, combat training in the Danger Room with a group of other students, didn't start till nine. Ellie chanced a glance at the grandfather clock in the corner landing of the plush carpeted staircase on her way downstairs; it was only half past eight. Half an hour till she had to fight for her life. She briefly considered skipping – as a telepathic mutant whose abilities didn't extend beyond mind reading, psychic communication, telempathy and telepathic speaking ( she was still stuck in the basic classes for telepathy, for crying out loud! ), her offensive powers were literally non-existent – but she'd already done it once last week. She could still remember Colossus' pained lecture, which had lasted for over _half an hour_ , and he'd talked himself out until he was blue in the face. He'd even used her _full name_ ( Emmeline Isadora Phimister ), in his best imitation of a typical _Tired Dad_ voice. To top it all off, she'd been given a week's worth of detention.

"Negasonic!" Colossus called. "Come, we have mission!"

Ellie had been on the way to the library to find new reading material, and now, at the sound of her name, she cautiously poked her head into the kitchen. She held her breath, knowing that the smell of food would make her stomach turn. Thankfully, only a half eaten bowl of cereal and a glass of freshly squeezed OJ sat on the breakfast bar – the smell of bacon and pancakes was notably absent. The iron giant was already heading into the elevator that led into the lower levels - it was off-limits to students, unless they were being supervised by a senior member. Ellie squeezed into the elevator car, which glided swiftly into motion once she was on board. Colossus withdrew a lone key from his pocket and plugged it into the panel. All the lights cleared except for the ones in the bottom level. Ellie eyed the key thoughtfully, noting that it might come in handy if she ever needed to make off with the resident jet.

"Colossus, wait up!"

As soon as the car slid to a stop, Colossus was already walking towards the sleek black craft, muttering under his breath. Her mentor had clearly forgotten that he had longer legs than hers; for every one of his strides, Ellie had to jog to catch up with him. Colossus obligingly slowed down, waiting until Ellie had managed to catch up with him before he broke into a brisk pace once again. She pushed past the muscles aches and pains as best as she could, unused to the early morning run.

"I've given Deadpool every chance to join us, but he'd rather act like a child. _A heavily armed child."_ Her mentor shook his head in exasperation. "When will he grow up and see benefits of becoming X-Men?"

" _Which_ benefits?" Ellie drawled out sarcastically. "The tres-lame unitards in banana yellow? The house that blows up every few months?"

" _Please._ House blowing up builds character." Of all the points that Ellie had brought forward, Colossus decided to address the standard complaint from almost every student living in the mansion. Redecorating could be a major pain in the ass – especially when one had to constantly restock clothing and furniture. At this point, Ellie wondered why she even bothered unpacking her clothes from the shopping bags. "You ate breakfast, yes? Breakfast is most important meal of the day."

Ellie never ate breakfast. "Uh –"

Colossus' face looked remarkably disapproving. Rummaging about in the pocket of his jeans, he pulled out a _Bionutritional Power Crunch Bar_ , and pressed it into her hands. At least he hadn't forcibly dragged her back to the kitchen so that he could hover over her as she tried to force down a mouthful of cold cereal or oatmeal. "Here. Protein Bar. Good for bones."

He nodded approvingly as Ellie turned it over in her hands, crinkling her nose at the thought of having to eat. She tucked it in her back pocket, with a mental note to eat it when her stomach had recovered, raising a single black brow, silently asking why he'd felt the need to give it to her.

He added as an after-thought, "Deadpool may try to break yours."

 _Oh, wonderful._

And with that final, _encouraging_ note, Colossus shooed her into the jet.

At least she got to miss class.


	3. Girl Meets Douche

**A/N:** Thank you so much to everyone who has read this story so far! I have, like, 0 idea of how telepathy works, even though I've read the Wiki about it like 10 times, so I apologize for any errors I have made. Now, since I've started watching The Flash, I was thinking of doing a cross-over with that particular show, featuring our favorite moody teen, Ellie Phimister. I'll let everyone know once I've fleshed out a proper plot. Enjoy the new chapter - Reviews, favorites and subscriptions are appreciated!

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The moment the jet touches down, Colossus is already striding down the ramp. Ellie takes her time sauntering out of The Blackbird, popping a piece of the protein bar into her mouth. Her eyes take in the scene with a wince. Ellie walks over to Colossus, picking her way over tangled limbs and sheets of twisted metal, careful not to step on the patches of dried blood that cover the asphalt. Some of the puddles are still slick and shiny, and all Ellie can smell is smoke, acrid chemicals, burning plastics, the pungent smell of ammonia and charred flesh.

The pain almost doubles her over. It feels like hot pokers piercing her eyes. Flashes of each person's life plays like disjointed movie trailers in her mind. Ed is getting married in a week. Ryan golfs to get away from his wife. Stefan's little sister has been in a car accident, and is in critical condition. Ellie sees fronts of houses in every economic bracket, a horse barn, the sterile whiteness of a hospital room. Ooey-gooey macaroni and cheese, the slick fullness of egg noodles sliding down her throat, the heat of a family's secret recipe for red sauce that will never be passed on. Ellie tries to breathe through the nausea and pain, desperately trying to recall Miss Frost's classes.

" _In some situations, people can project so intensely that you don't have to focus to read them. The key to stopping the influx of memories is to_ block them out _. Put up a mental shield, so that you won't have to experience their pain, or their memories."_

 _Focus, Phimister, focus,_ Ellie thinks, rubbing her temples. She tries to relax her shoulders and force oxygen into her uncooperative lungs. She visualizes a door, the twin polished doors that lead to the X-Mansion. She pulls them firmly shut, and locks the door for good measure. Her head clears and her heart calms. Her breath comes back; the pain recedes like a tide going back out. No more images and memories assault her mind, and her shoulders droop in relief, like flowers at dusk.

Colossus eyes her worriedly as she stumbles over to him. If her gait is a little unsteady, or her expression too pinched and wan, he doesn't comment. Ellie tries to focus on the task at hand, swaying ever so slightly as she looks up at Deadpool – Colossus had ranted angrily about the Mercenary on the way to the Cross Town Expressway, calling his actions _'reckless'_ and _'irresponsible'._ The mercenary is at least a head taller than her, dressed in tacky red spandex with black accents.

"And _you_ are?" Deadpool so rudely demands, and Ellie gives him the stink eye.

"Negasonic Teenage Warhead," She trots out, her words short and clipped as she pops a piece of protein bar into her mouth.

"Negasonic Teenage – What the shit? That's the coolest name ever!"

Deadpool's loud exclamation catches her off guard. She's expected him to make fun of her codename like Kitty Pryde had during their very first meeting – "Wow, we are so running out of codenames" – and she has to bite down on her bottom lip to hide her smile. She shrugs, not really able to reply with a mouthful of nuts and chocolate.

"So, what? You're like, his sidekick?"

It is Colossus who answers with a jerk of his chin. "No, trainee."

"So, lemme guess. X-Men left you behind on, what? Shit detail?" Deadpool shoots back, waltzing past the pair and over to the only survivor from the car crash. It isn't a pretty picture; the man's face is a swollen mass of blood, and he has been impaled to a wall, presumably to keep him from running away.

But surprisingly, he isn't projecting as intensely. Not a single twinge of pain in his thoughts. Amazingly enough, Ellie feels nothing . . . Nothing at all from him. Narrowing her eyes, she tries to delve in deeper. A face pops into her own mind – a man, his entire face marked with pocked, ridged scars. He might have once been handsome – in a rugged, _Ryan Reynolds_ kind of way - but it is hard to tell under the wounds that make his flesh look like melted wax. The man is dressed in red spandex. Red spandex – Ellie flinches. The sensation that hits her is akin to a door slamming in her face. Suddenly, she is back in her own body, clenching her fists in a white knuckled grip. Slowly, deliberately, he raises his head. Stares right at her with a _very_ nasty grin on his face. An icy fingernail skims down Ellie's spine.

Her legs quiver like Jell-O, and Ellie moves to sit wearily on top of the hood of a Chevrolet; it is relatively unscathed, saved for a dent in the hood and a blown out tire. Her feet dangle about a foot above the ground, drawing attention to her painfully short stature of five feet. She feels like she's just gone ten rounds with a T-Rex; her limbs ache and a headache lances her temples, but she isn't so out of it that she can't shoot back a snarky retort. "So what does that make _you_?"

"Pretending you're not here, Negasonic Teenage Warhead. Can we trade names?" The Merc with a Mouth punches the man in the face, and his victim spits out a wad of blood.

 _Gross._

Pointedly ignoring Deadpool, Ellie mutters, "Can we go?"

" _Look, I'm a teenage girl."_ Swishing his hips in what is clearly supposed to be a seductive manner; Deadpool pretends to flip his hair, sashaying over to Ellie with a high-pitched, sugary sweet falsetto. _"Oh, I'd rather be anywhere but_ here _. I'm all about long sullen silences, followed by mean comments, followed by more silences._ So, what's it gonna be, _huh?"_

Deadpool bends down to look her in the eyes, until there is only a whisper separating their faces. With a tilt of his red, spandex-covered head, he demands, "Long sullen silence, or mean comment? Go on."

Ellie's eyes meet Deadpool's; except, she stares into circles of white spandex, right where _his_ eyes should be. The aches and pains ring a mental bell, reminding her that using any more of her powers might be fatal. As usual, Ellie ignores the warning, and tries to get inside Deadpool's head. She frowns. She can't get a read on him. Everything is fuzzy, and Ellie can't make anything out. Like sheets of water sluicing down a window pane, the inside of Deadpool's head is unclear, as much of a mystery to her as the man outside is. Like a tuning fork being stuck, a hum vibrates, gradually growing louder in volume and intensity, until Ellie can make out a phrase, repeated over and over again -

 **GET OUT GET OUT GET OUT -**

There's a loud crack, and Ellie gasps, surprised to be back in her own body. It's odd to feel the heavy sensation of her arms and legs again. Someone seems to be hammering on her left temple from inside her skull. Ellie shakes her head to clear it; feeling fuzzy and disoriented. She's been able to get a read on anyone, able to sift through their memories for at least a few minutes before they realized she was in their head, but never before has she encountered a block of this nature.

After a minute or so of _'long, sullen silence'_ in which she tries to recover use of her vocal chords, Ellie admits sourly, ". . . You've kind of got me in a box here."

" _Ah-Ha!"_

Triumphantly, Deadpool shakes his hips and punches a fist in the air. Ellie watches him, dazed, and more than just a little tired. Sharp pain slices through her head, agonizing enough that Ellie whimpers. Using the sleeve of her jacket, she mops up the thick, red gush that doesn't seem to stop. Her hand trembles. She hopes Colossus doesn't notice.

"Negasonic!"

Oh, yeah. He's seen the blood.

"'M _fine_ Colossus," Ellie says thickly, tasting iron in the blood that trickles into her mouth. "Can we just go home?"

Casting her one last anxious glance, Colossus' attention, for the time being, returns to Deadpool. "We can't allow this, Deadpool. Please, come along quietly."

"You big, chrome, cock gobbler! Are you really going to fuck this up for me? Trust me, that wheezing bag of dick tips has it coming! He's pure _evil!"_ He flings a piece of scrap metal at Colossus, who mutters, _"That's not nice."_

Deadpool pauses mid-rant, flinging a hand out for emphasis. "Besides, nobody's getting hurt!"

The sickening crash has Ellie twisting around in her seat. She barely has time to catch a man's terrified expression, right before he crashes onto the road in a tangle of limbs. Ellie flinches. T.J. is planning to ask his pretty neighbor out. She tastes cream coating her throat and feels slick _Mee Pok_ noodles sliding down to a pleasant fullness. She stares dryly at Deadpool, looking as deadpan as she possibly can – the effect is ruined slightly by the fact that she has to keep a firm hold on the bridge of her nose to staunch the bleeding.

"That guy was already up here when I got there!"

"Wade, you are better than this. Join us, and use your powers for good. Be a super hero!"

Ellie, for one, thought that Magneto had a better chance of asking the Professor out on a date. Colossus' lecture – or rallying cry – bounces harmlessly off Deadpool's ears, like acid rain running off the tightly sealed stomata on a leaf. Instead, the Mercenary picks up a stray piece of metal and cackles wildly as he flings it at the man pinned to the wall. _Yeah, total hero material,_ Ellie thinks sarcastically.

"If I ever decide to become a crime-fighting shit swizzler, who rooms with a bunch of other little whiners at Neverland Mansion with some creepy, old, bald, Heaven's Gate-looking motherfucker... on that day, I'll send your shiny, happy ass a friend request!" Ellie still can't get a read on Deadpool, but she can clearly see the cloud of irritation surrounding him, pulsing against her like heat from a bonfire. "And until then, I'm gonna do what I came here to do! Either that, or slap the bitch out of you!"

"Wade –"

"Hey!" Ellie calls out, her eyes fixed on the man who removes the sword from his shoulder in one quick yank. He is on his feet and running before she can even blink.

"Zip it, Sinead!"

Ellie tries again. "Hey, Douche-Pool!"

This time, he actually turns around, pointing a finger at the man who isn't there anymore. "And I hope _you're_ watching –"

His gasp of horror is almost comical. Ellie can feel the mingled shock and anger – but mostly anger – radiating off Deadpool, along with a curious tinge of despair. If she'd been able to read his thoughts, she might be able to piece together the reasons behind his volatile emotions, but seeing as how she's greeted with a blur when she tries, that is out of the question.

Colossus holds his hands up to pacify Deadpool. "Quite unfortunate –"

Deadpool's head swivels back and forth, from the empty spot and over to Colossus, before he lets out an angry yell, and goes for a right hook to Colossus' jaw. It would have given her mentor a nasty bruise – if he didn't have iron skin, a fact which Deadpool seems to have forgotten. Deadpool falls to the ground on his knees, his wrist flopping limply like a sack of skin, and Ellie cracks a smile.

"Wade, please –"

"Cock shot!" Next up is a hit to Colossus' nuts, which affects Deadpool more than it does to Ellie's mentor. There is a sickening crunch, and if Ellie isn't so grossed out by the fact that Colossus' scrotum is being used as a punching bag, she might have pulled her phone out to record it for prosperity. "Oh, your _poor_ wife!"

"You _really_ should stop –"Colossus warns.

"All the dinosaurs feared the T-Rex." Both wrists broken now, Deadpool falls back on his legs, aiming an axe kick at Colossus. Another crack later, Deadpool is lying on the ground, squealing in pain like a stuck pig. "Oh! _Ah!_ I promise this gets worse for you, big boy!"

Ellie laughs. Colossus doesn't. "This is embarrassing. Please, stay down."

"You ever hear the one legged man in the ass kicking contest?" Deadpool makes a valiant effort, getting back up on his feet – _foot_ \- with some difficulty.

"Do you have off-switch . . .?"

"Yeah, it's right next to the prostate, or is that the _on_ switch –"

"Enough!"

Ellie giggles. Deadpool is flung a good four feet away, glass shattering and buckling as his spine meets with the windshield of a car. Moaning and groaning, Deadpool doesn't seem the worse for the wear. Colossus marches over, clipping a handcuff to Deadpool's wrist and securing it to his own hand, in case the man in the spandex tries to make a break for it.

"Let us go talk to the Professor."

"McAvoy or Stewart? These time-lines are so confusing . . ."

Ellie tunes out Deadpool's nonsensical ramblings, and hops off the car. She wobbles, and nearly trips over a decapitated head. She looks away, stomach churning, and her legs buckle as a wave of dizziness floods her. Ellie shakes back burning, twirling fatigue. _I have got to get to sleep earlier._

"I'm _fine,"_ Ellie says again, in response to Colossus' _look._

"Negasonic, you should stop using your powers." Colossus warns, but drops the subject with a frown. "No more –" He waves his free hand around, trying – and _failing_ – to describe her telepathic abilities.

"Yeah, yeah," Ellie mutters, right as her legs give out and she collapses to the ground.

The last thing she hears is a sickening squelch, and Colossus' exclamation of disgust, right before her eyes flutter shut.


	4. Ellie Is Lectured

**A/N:** Whew! Finally finished the new chapter! Reviews, subscriptions and favorites are appreciated!

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" _Who are you?" A cute, baby-faced boy with sandy brown hair knelt in front of her._

 _Ellie said nothing, huddling in the corner of the attic with her arms wrapped around her knees. She was still dressed in her ivory eyelet sundress from Chloe, her hair tied up into curly black pigtails – the only reminder of the home that she'd left behind._

" _Silent treatment, huh?" He smiled. "I'm Bobby. I'm eleven. I've been here three years. Want me to show you around?"_

 _Ellie shook her head. She didn't want to move. She wanted to go home. The large mansion might have been cold and drafty, but the staff knew her and cared for her, more than her parents ever did. Once they'd found out that she was a freak, they'd seized the chance to dump her at Xavier's School for Gifted Children, with a message to keep her there until she was normal._

" _Come on, I'll show you a nest of robins. Have you ever seen baby birds? They're kinda ugly, but they'll fly soon."_

 _Ellie shook her head again, but she was intrigued._

" _They're down by the creek. Do you like to fish? Can you swim? Have you ever collected fireflies in a jar?"_

 _Ellie shook her head again. She loved fireflies, but she couldn't remember the last time she'd seen them._

" _Do you like marshmallows? I have a stash. I'll share with you. They taste great in hot chocolate." He held out his hand. "You don't have to talk if you don't wanna." He smiled again. "I've got a worm to feed the robins. Wanna come watch?"_

 _Ellie heard running feet on the stairs and adults talking in hushed voices in the rooms below. Her name came up often. Emmeline Isadora Phimister, daughter of Senator Ross Phimister and philanthropist Janelle Phimister. She wanted out of here. Nodding, Ellie took his hand – it is as cold as the inside of a refrigerator, and burns against her own clammy palms – and let Bobby pull her to her feet._

Ellie's eyes open to a bright, white light. She is in an unfamiliar room, a white room. The wall beside her is covered in long vertical blinds; over her head, the glaring lights blind her. She is propped up on a hard, uneven bed - a bed with rails. The pillows are flat and lumpy. There is an annoying beeping sound somewhere close by. She hopes this means she is still alive. Death shouldn't be this uncomfortable. Her hands are all twisted up with clear tubes, and something is taped across her face, under her nose. She lifts her hand to rip it off.

"Negasonic, behave." A familiar voice admonishes her, and her hand is caught in an iron grip.

"Colossus?" Ellie rasps, her eyes flickering over to find her mentor hovering just inches away from her bed. "What – Oh, _shit_ –"

" _Language,_ Negasonic."

She ignores him. "Shit – Douche-Pool, he – he got away, didn't he?"

The silence that blankets the room like a layer of snow is answer enough. Ellie muffles a groan, flopping back against her pillows. A sharp pain in her chest feels like a steak knife and needles radiate down her arms. Doctor Cecilia Reyes, slim in a white lab coat bustles in, clucking as she checks Ellie's vitals. "Negasonic Teenage Warhead. Overusing your powers, I hear?"

Ellie shrugs, the movement making the pain flare up sickeningly.

"Your visitors are waiting outside." Doctor Reyes says, scribbling madly on her clipboard. "Your nosebleed's stopped, but I've applied some _Naseptin_ nasal cream in case. I recommend taking it easy for the rest of the day."

"Emmeline Isadora Phimister." Emma Frost's voice marches ahead of her into the room, and Ellie winces.

As usual, Miss Frost is resplendent in a white velvet skirt suit. She carries herself like the queen of England, and the ensemble is one that would have made Victorian Elizabeth proud. Layers of petticoats peek out from underneath a full skirt. A jacket corsets her tiny torso and accentuates her bust. Colossus and Doctor Reyes take this as their cue to beat a hasty retreat, leaving Ellie alone with a _very_ mad teacher.

" _Emmeline._ _What_ did I tell you in class?" Anger vibrates through Miss Frost's clipped words.

Ellie licks her dry lips to stall for time as she frantically mulls over an acceptable answer. "Uh – to be careful, and stuff."

"To be precise, I told you to _stop_ using them whenever you feel _pain._ " Miss Frost shoots her the dirtiest, angriest glance, one that can cut diamonds. "And it appears that as usual, you have _not_ listened. I would like to know _why_. Do you have a _death wish_ , or is your memory _faulty_?"

"Uh – Well –"

"Let me guess. You had everything under control. _Well,_ I am here to inform you that you are _pushing your limits_ , Miss Phimister, and _one day_ , if you keep taking all these risks, Colossus is going to have to carry you back in a _body bag_ –"

"You don't know what it's _like,_ " Ellie spits out, rage at her helplessness and her lack of ability eating at her calm. "I've been here for _six years_ , and I can't do jack _shit_ besides basic mind-reading."

The hard look in her eyes softens. "Ellie, you are _young._ Your powers will grow and increase as _you_ grow and develop. Some powers remain latent until activated by severe stress, or remain unnoticed throughout the person's lifetime, while others are apparent immediately from birth. You just need more training -"

"Or maybe I just need to push myself more!" Ellie interjects, trying to get her volatile emotions under control; her façade of forced calm is rapidly splintering apart. "Even when I tried, I couldn't get a read on him –"

"Ellie, you have to calm down," Miss Frost's eyes flit over to the rapid beeping of the heart monitor. "And what do you mean by that last statement?"

"I couldn't get a read on Deadpool, Miss Frost," She mumbles, her voice fraying apart at the edges. "I _tried_ , but –"

"Have you not read his files?" Upon seeing Ellie's shake of her head, Miss Frost elaborates. "As a side effect of his healing factor, Deadpool's brain cells are perpetually dying and regenerating in equilibrium, rendering him nearly invulnerable to psychic and telepathic powers. He is immune to mental intrusion. I'm guessing you only heard 'static' or something along those lines?"

Ellie nods dejectedly, toying with the tubes in her arms and picking at her blankets. "I only felt his emotions, and even that was for a brief second."

Thankfully, Doctor Reyes bustles back in, gently but firmly telling Miss Frost that the patient needs rest. Miss Frost leaves, saying that Professor X will come talk to her later, the thought of which makes Ellie's stomach tighten with nerves. She doesn't feel like relieving her failures over and over again.

Her parents disowned her for being a _'freak'._ Being abnormal is all she's good for, and she can't even do _that._

The thought upsets her more than she thought it would. With a sigh, Ellie balls up on her side, curling up under the blankets, hoping that tomorrow will be better than the awful reality that today has been.


	5. Girl Meets Douche - Round 2

A/N: And so the action begins in the next chapter! Cookies to anyone who can recognize the song and what movie it's used in! As usual, reviews, subscriptions and favorites are appreciated!

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"I won't give up, no I won't give in~"

Ellie tunes out Jubilee's tuneless singing and Noriko's high-pitched laughter, and continues rifling through the pages of glossy magazines, fantasizing that she too, is lounging on a raft in Sardinia, dancing the flamenco in Madrid, or wandering pensively through the streets of Bombay. She can't shake the bad feeling that hovers over her gut, icy fingers of dread tightening her bowels. Bobby occasionally glances up from his Calculus homework to shoot her a look of concern, which she waves off.

"Till I reach the end, and then I'll start again!"

Through a peal of giggles, Noriko sings the next line, shaking her hips and fluffing her blue streaked hair out. Rolling her eyes, Ellie tosses the last magazine aside, watching dryly as the two girls parade around her room, singing along with the Gazelle on the wide screen of her TV. She wants to remark that they sound like dying blue whales, but she figures that that'll make them sing even louder. Ellie hopes that the movie will end soon.

Ellie glances up from where she's pressed her head into her pillow. The off-key singing has stopped, and she can only hear the honey-toned voice of the _real_ singer through the surround sound speakers. The trio are clustered over by the French window, their eyes glued to the front drive. Jubilee beckons her over, her brow furrowed like the Rockies. "Ellie, come quick."

"What is it?"

Electricity crackles at the tips of Noriko's fingers, and the small hairs along the nape of Ellie's neck stand up. "There's a weirdo in a red suit climbing over the front gate."

"Should I . . . ?" Jubilee's hands light up with neon pink light, and _that_ makes Ellie lurch out of bed before her room ends up getting destroyed.

She ambles over to the window, pushing aside the gauzy muslin curtains for a better look. There's no mistaking the tacky red suit. Having no desire to spend the day in the hospital, Ellie refrains from reading his thoughts. She groans. "Oh, _wonderful."_

"You know that weirdo, Ellie?" Bobby's eyes grow shiny with surprise.

Ellie explains curtly, already heading downstairs, "Met him yesterday."

Before Deadpool can raise his hand to knock on the door, Ellie yanks it open, arching a single black brow. His relief is palpable.

"Ripley, from Alien 3!" He says by way of greeting.

She snorts. " _Fuck_ , you're old."

Ellie studies him. It's easier to read Deadpool's emotions today – his mental shields aren't as highly guarded, and she can detect the worry coming off him in waves, along with tension like a tightly coiled spring. Something is wrong. She doesn't ask, waiting for Deadpool to broach the subject himself.

" _Ha!_ Fake laugh, hiding real pain." He makes a shooing motion with his hand. "Now, go get Silver Balls!"

 _And there it comes._ "You guys going out for a bite to eat? Early bird special?"

"Yeah, like there's something wrong with eating before sundown or saving money." Even under the mask, she can tell that he is rolling his eyes. "No. You know the bad guy that _you_ let go?"

To be fair, she _did_ try to warn him about the guy making a break for it. "So?"

"He's got my girl." His voice is naked with his pain, and that makes Ellie do a double take. "And you guys are gonna help me get her back."

Before Ellie can open her mouth to say that she isn't exactly _fighter material_ , Colossus speaks up, his voice sounding way too hopeful and chipper. "Wade? Is that you?"

"Yeah, it's me, _Deadpool,_ and I've got an offer than you can't refuse!" 'Wade' raises his voice, addressing Colossus with an edge in his voice.

Ellie smirks. "Your name is _Wade?"_

" _Her_ name's Emmeline Isadora Phimister." Jubilee pops up at Ellie's elbow, grinning evilly.

 _Et tu, Jubilee?_

Ellie whacks her up the head with a scowl that promises revenge. "Shut it, _Jubilation Lee Ser Kee."_

She shuts the door on Deadpool's splutters of laughter, making a mental note to sneak banana peels under Jubilee's mattress. Jubilee cackles wildly, darting away and out of reach from a very angry Ellie. Jubilee sprints up the stairs, and Ellie sinks onto the sofa in the den with a sigh.

"You're going on a mission?" Though Bobby's voice is casual, his body language is anything but. "With Colossus?"

Ellie opts for playing it cool with a shrug. "Looks like it."

"Worried?" He studies her with a slightly strained smile.

"As if." Ellie swallows, trying to quash down her nervousness.

Bobby arches an eyebrow. "Really?"

"I'll be fine." Wondering if she is projecting, Ellie awkwardly tries to reassure him, but her insecurities scream.

 _I can't fight. I'm just a useless door-stop. Why'd he choose_ me _?_

"Hey, for what it's worth, I think you'll do great." Bobby gingerly pats her shoulder. "Trust your instincts. Remember your training. It'll kick in, trust me."

Ellie smiles grudgingly, a slight curve to the edges of her lips. Bobby's little pep-talk has worked; she isn't as nervous, at least, though she can't shake the unsettling feeling that has settled over her like a shroud.

"Negasonic, suit up!"

Ellie glances down at her clothes. "Into _what?"_

"Probably something other than a flimsy tank top and shorts." Nodding at her outfit of choice with a smile, Bobby leaves.


	6. Girl Meets Taxi Driver

**A/N:** So, my new school's doing an orientation, and there are all these groups based on superheros ( eg. X-Men, Avengers, Teen Titans ). Guess which group I was in? *winks* COLOSSUS. ( There was sadly no Negasonic Teenage Warhead. )

* * *

Ellie, for one, doesn't know why Deadpool so stubbornly insists on taking a cramped little taxi when they can hitch a ride on the far more comfortable Blackbird, which rests comfortably in the subterranean levels of the school. Colossus had offered, but Deadpool had refused. Ellie thinks about adding in her own opinion, but whatever, this is Deadpool's show.

The driver, with café-au-lait skin and nervous, shifting eyes the color of crushed obsidian turns up music full of unfamiliar yelling, pulsing beats and loud drums. The taxi's small interior smells like what a faraway sultan's place might smell like. Exotic. Overpowering. Spicy. The sun shines like French vanilla ice cream. It is cold outside; Ellie tries to roll down the window, but it stubbornly refuses to budge. She tries breathing through her mouth instead of her nose and that helps a little.

Last night had been one of the worst nights. She had woken up with a pain in her chest so excruciating that she couldn't breathe. She was drenched in sweat and the bed sheets were so wet they were pasted together. _Gross._

As usual, Ellie looks like a punk-esque ragamuffin in a tattered black turtleneck that hangs past her hips, cutoff leggings, a black hoodie that she's nicked from Bobby, and beaten-up motorcycle boots. She doesn't see the point in breaking out the banana yellow unitard, since she probably will be asked to hide somewhere safe till the battle had ended.

Ellie wonders if she should say anything about the guy in the trunk. His mind is like an open wound, terror seeping into the air. Her vision blurs, and vertigo hits her at the speed of which Bandhu's mind is going – He's thinking about his pretty betrothed, Geetha, with a long spill of black curls, smooth milk chocolate skin and hazel green eyes. He wonders if he'll ever see her again. Ellie winces, and shuts him out.

"So!" Deadpool is saying, deep in conversation with the taxi driver, whose nervousness is palpable. "Any luck winning Geetha back?"

"I tried to hold on tight, Mr. Pool, but Bandhu is more craftier and handsomer than me." Dopinder eases out a breath of regret through clenched teeth.

Ellie chooses this moment to speak up. "Which was why you felt the need to kidnap him and stuff him in your trunk."

Before anyone can comment on Ellie's dry retort, the taxi bounces over a pothole, and the high-pitched scream of a man can clearly be heard. She gives Dopinder a look, one that says, _Yeah, I know what you've got in the trunk,_ bub _._

"Dopinder?" Deadpool asks carefully. "What was that?"

Before he can reply, Ellie pipes up again, carefully picking out bits and pieces from Dopinder's mind. "He's got a man in the trunk. He kidnapped his _'romantic rival'_ at approximately seven thirty this morning, when Bandhu was on his way to work, and now he's planning to, and I quote, _'Cut him like a tandoori fish and dump his carcass on Geetha's doorstep'._ Well, I wonder who could have taught him _that?"_

"Ban . . . _Who?"_ Colossus asks, in the rumble of an earthquake, powerful and demanding.

She makes eyes at Deadpool, who looks unperturbed, a stark contrast from Dopinder, who is sweating buckets, his eyes darting from the road to the skinny, waifish looking fifteen year old in the backseat, probably wondering how she knows so much. A smirk plays at Ellie's lips. This is _fun._

"That was my romantic rival, Bandhu." Dopinder blurts out in a rush. "He's tied up in the trunk. I'm doing as you said, DP, I'm going to cut him open like a tandoori fish and I'm going to dump his guts on Geetha's doorstep."

"Real romantic," Ellie mumbles sarcastically. "He's _such_ a charmer."

Now Deadpool's head swivels back and forth, from hulking Colossus to nervous, sweaty Dopinder, as though he is watching a particularly interesting tennis match. He points his index finger at Colossus, and then at Ellie herself, who is watching him dryly. "I did not tell him to do that, _absolutely not!_ It got lost in translation!"

 _Riiiight._

Colossus stops sipping his _Green Tea Cream_ from Starbucks and stares back at Deadpool, unamused. He doesn't buy the guy's explanation, and Ellie, personally, doesn't need to read Deadpool's mind to know that he is preening like a peacock.

"Dopinder, this is no way to win Geetha's heart back!" Deadpool would have played the part of 'concerned friend' well – if he hadn't staged whispered _"I'm so proud of you"._ "Drop Bandhu off, safe and gentle-like ( 'Kill him' ) and win Geetha back the old fashioned way, with your boyish charm ( 'Kidnap her' )!"

"He's super dead," Ellie mumbles to Colossus, whose face looks stony.

Dopinder screeches to a halt, throwing Ellie into a corner. She rubs her shoulder and cuts a baleful glance at the ( crappy ) driver, who doesn't look the least bit apologetic. Her gut rings the itty bitty panic bell, a knee-jerk reaction whenever certain doom impends. All her instincts are screaming at her to get the hell out of the taxi, pronto. Jittering impatiently in her seat, Ellie watches through the partition as Deadpool and Dopinder trade high-fives.

Twisting around in his seat, Deadpool says in an awfully chipper voice for someone who has had their future baby momma kidnapped by a psychotic villain, "Now, let's get out there and make a difference!"

Ellie nearly turns and ducks back into the taxi that pulls away in a cloud of smoke. Her cheeks feel hot and the rest of her cold. Her little arm-hair warning system is on high alert. She'll take her chances in the taxi.

 _It's a bad idea._

She follows Deadpool anyway.


	7. Ellie Kicks Ass, Part 1

**A/N:** Mm, I'm thinking about doing an origin story for Ellie once this story is finished. So, keep an eye out for that! The story'll be sort of a prequel to this one, explaining how Ellie came to join the X-Men! In other news, Ellie and Colossus are like, my BrOtp. Along with Ellie and Deadpool, of course. *winks* Reviews, favorites and subscriptions are appreciated!

* * *

There isn't a good way or a good time to tell Deadpool, but Ellie does it anyway, having noticed that his hideous black and pink rucksack is not slung over his shoulder. "Hey." As if on cue, the music stops, and so do Deadpool and Colossus. "Where's your duffel bag?"

Deadpool stops short, and fumbles with clumsy fingers for his phone. Ellie resumes playing with hers and waits for Deadpool to contact Dopinder. Colossus shoots Deadpool a disapproving glare when his muffled curses float through the air; clearly, he doesn't want the mercenary to 'corrupt' his young charge any further. Deadpool hangs up with an irritated huff, tucking his phone away into one of the many pockets in his suit.

"Fine! We'll have to do this the old fashioned way! With two swords, and maximum effort!" He looks away, seemingly into the distance. "Cue the music."

 _Fear._ It covers her mind, like a sticky spider's web. It slows her pace, dries her mouth. She's learned to trust her instincts over the years, and they are screaming at her to _run._ Ellie has to force herself to place one leg in front of the other. Her chest feels tight. As she continues walking, a gust of wind chaffs her cheek and ruffles her hair. An acrid smell fills the air, one that she can't quite place. It makes her feel even more anxious.

A gargantuan ship of some sort towers above the trio, languishing smack dab in the middle of the scrap yard. It looks somewhat like a modern version of Noah's Ark, only, instead of wood, this one is made out of steel and chromium. Though once mighty and majestic, dents spot its silver surface. Some parts of the metal on the craft has melted and then solidified into a lumpy mess. Ellie shoots Colossus a questioning look, and he mouths, 'SHIELD Helicarrier'.

 _Huh._

Ellie's heard about the Battle of New York, but only Colossus had actually been in the midst of the action with the other members of the X-Men, helping to fight off the alien invaders, and her mentor had been surprisingly tight-lipped about the whole experience. Fighting aliens was on her bucket list, but the trainees had been explicitly forbidden from sneaking off and 'getting a piece of the action'.

"Wade Wilson!" The man from yesterday, now completely healed from his encounter with Deadpool, steps onto the very edge of the Helicarrier. He spreads out his arms. "What's my name?"

"Oh, Imma fucking spell it out for you." Deadpool mutters beside her, and Ellie hears him crack his knuckles.

She feels their approach, a skin-prickling roll of terror that washes over her. A cold hand rests on her heart. She glances at Deadpool and Colossus, and it is as though she is looking at them from a distance; as though the sound of their voices comes to her from a long way off. There is something in the air – something lethal, menacing – and she has the strongest feeling all at once that they are under threat.

A group of men, dressed in black combat fatigues and armed to the teeth, converge around the trio, sniper rifles aimed and ready to fire. Ellie takes an inadvertent step back, resisting the urge to run around screaming like Jubilation whenever she sees her favorite band on the telly. She's never been one to back down from a fight, and she isn't going to start now.

"Superhero landing!" Deadpool is babbling excitedly, practically hanging off her leather-clad arm in his excitement. "She's going to do a superhero landing!"

Watching skeptically, Ellie purses her lips and lifts a hand to her face, shielding her eyes from the bits of dirt and gravel that the woman's 'superhero landing' has sent flying around. Long black hair has been pulled away from a tanned face, revealing hardened eyes, ringed with kohl. She's wearing a stretchy top with a plunging neckline, and tights, along with lace-up combat boots. She strides towards them, looking about as friendly as a saber toothed tiger.

 _Get away. Danger. Enemy._ Ellie feels the increasing pressure to get away from this woman, to run. She's seen the noirette before. _She's the one who's going to kill_ – Ellie can't finish the thought. Her stomach twists in terror, and Ellie feels light-headed with the adrenaline singing in her veins.

Deadpool waves a hand at Colossus, "You're a _lovely_ lady, but I'm saving myself for Francis. That's why I brought him."

"I'd prefer not to hit a woman," Colossus begins, swinging around his trusty pair of handcuffs, the bonds as soulless as a pair of empty eye sockets. "So, please –"

Deadpool throws himself to the ground, and even Ellie can't stop the strangled squeak that leaves her throat when Colossus is sent flying a good kilometer away, backhanded by that nasty snake. Her mentor groans when his face hits the ground, sending up more gravel flying everywhere. If it had been anyone else ( Deadpool, for example ), Ellie might have considered laughing. But this was _Colossus._ He didn't deserve to get smacked around like a piñata.

"I mean . . ." Deadpool says, scrambling back onto his feet. " . . . That's why I brought her?"

Her breath is tight in her chest. This is her first time in _actual combat_. The simulations in the Danger Room are one thing, but going up against guns and metal is another. She might be a mutant, but she's hardly immortal. One bullet to the heart or the brain, and it's game over.

The phone at her hip pings and vibrates at the same time. She eases the phone from her pocket and presses the message button with trembling fingers. It's from Bobby.

 **GO LAY SOME HATE.**

Her lips curve, ever so slightly. Ellie's breathing slows, as does her heartbeat, which thunders in her chest like a jackhammer. Her thumb moves swiftly across the keys. _Ofc._

"Oh, no, finish your tweet." Deadpool is saying, and she holds up her pointer finger, the universal sign for, _'Wait just a diddly-darn minute,_ bub _'._ "No, wait, that's – Okay, just give us a second. There you go, hashtag it."

Ellie shoves her phone back into her pocket.

Ellie feels her anger rising, and focuses on that, since it chases away the chill that permeates deep into her bones. Seeing Colossus struck by this nasty woman has summoned a wave of fury from deep inside her, unlike anything she's ever felt before.

No — that's wrong. She's felt it before. When she'd learned that her parents had essentially abandoned her at the X-Mansion. She'd curled up in a corner of the attic, a look of frozen horror on her face. Colossus had sat next to her, saying nothing, his expression afflicted as he'd awkwardly patted her on the back and made soothing noises. He'd held her as her quiet sobs had eventually faded away to nothing. Then, the white-hot anger had lanced through her. She had wanted to kill them herself, for tossing a human _child_ aside, as one would do to a pair of worn-out shoes.

Ellie doesn't think. She simply acts, now blind with a mingled combination of rage and fear.

She has no such problems with gallantry, unlike Colossus. Ellie lashes her hand through the air in a flicking motion, forcing the powers that sleep deep inside her to the surface. Even though she's at least six feet away, the woman flies backwards and slams against the metal of the Helicarrier. There is a sickening crack as the back of her skull shatters against the hard surface. _I did it._ Dopamine, the happy chemical, floods her brain with such force that Ellie feels light-headed. Or maybe that's because she's pushed past her limits in one fell swoop.

With a snarl, the woman swipes impatiently at the blood now trickling from her nose. "All right, then. _FIRE!"_

Just as Ellie's quivering knees give out from under her, Deadpool swings her up into his arms. Her body is completely covered by his spandex-covered form, blocking her line of sight – as well as any stray bullets that might hit her. They are racing for cover now, and Deadpool sets her down gently behind a hulking mass of scrap metal that does an admirable job of shielding them. They huddle together, pressed shoulder to shoulder. Ellie just tries to breathe through the pain that has come in full force, feeling nauseated and shivery.

"Finish fucking her the fuck up!" Deadpool is saying, right as Colossus strides by their little corner, a disapproving frown etched onto his face. Bullets bounce right off his metal skin.

Colossus, moving on only after Ellie gives him a weak nod, admonishes Deadpool, in a voice laced with steel. "Language, please!"

"Suck a cock!" Deadpool retorts, making a very rude gesture with his fingers.

The walls are folding in on her. The world spins too fast, with colors too bright for her eyes, sounds too loud in her ears. _He's going to die, we're going to die –_

"No." Ellie mumbles, her eyes burning. Fear vies with her anger, sending a shiver down her spine. _"No."_

 _Not going to happen._


	8. Ellie Faints More Times Than Jason Grace

**A/N:** TBH, my favorite part of the Deadpool movie was the 'LOOK AWAY CHILD, LOOK AWAY' part. I find it funny ( and sickeningly sweet ) how Deadpool seems to have a soft spot for Ellie. I wish there was more ( purely platonic ) fanfiction about them! Reviews, favorites and subscriptions are appreciated!

* * *

It makes Ellie's head swim, but she turns her head and peers through a crack. Colossus is trading punches with the buxom woman, but he's alive and kicking, which Ellie takes as a good sign. Bullets are raining down on their little shelter, and she clamps down on the urge to turn and run screaming out of the scrap yard.

"Look away, child." It takes Ellie a moment to realize that he's speaking to her. Surely she's not the only one who takes _"look away"_ as _"there's no better time than now."_ She looks. "LOOK AWAY!"

Ellie looks away.

" _A-Ah!"_

Deadpool's little cries and shrieks of pain immediately make Ellie chance a glance. She immediately wishes she hasn't. The sight of Deadpool undoing his fly and ripping out his tighty whities is enough to make her stomach churn – _oh, God, did she just see his_ _schlong_ – and Ellie clamps her eyes shut once more, waiting with bated breath for the all clear.

"WAIT! _WAIT!"_

And Ellie is treated to the sight of Deadpool waving about his underwear, which has been tied to a stick as a makeshift white flag.

"You only _work_ for that shit-speckled muffin fart! So, Imma give you a chance to lay down your weapons in exchange for preferential, bordering on gentle, _possibly_ , even lover-like treatment." There is a heartbeat of silence, right before they decide that 'Francis' is scarier than Deadpool, and promptly resume shooting.

"Fine! Commando!" Deadpool snaps, unsheathing his swords.

Right before he can jump out, Ellie grabs hold of his arm and tugs, forcing him to look at her. She licks her dry lips. She can feel Vanessa's mingled fear and anger spilling onto her, which spikes as she fights against the man known as _Francis._ It's like watching a butterfly take on a bear. "The girl. She's on the top of that Helicarrier. He's putting her in a glass coffin."

Deadpool spews out a mouthful of curses. She doesn't need to see past the spandex to know that there is an expression of horrible pain on his face. She feels a sorrow so heavy, it makes Ellie feel like she's swallowing copper, with a hint of chicory.

"He won't kill her," Ellie adds softly, biting back the next word on the tip of her tongue. _Yet._

With a feral snarl, Deadpool charges out from behind their little corner. A split second later, Ellie hears the sickening squelch and screams as Deadpool sends limbs flying, slicing through flesh and bone and sends blood splattering everywhere. Her teeth chatter and shivers wrack her body. She tastes cinnamon, and bitter eggnog on her tongue. She bends and heaves nothing but air. Ellie feels dizzy and disoriented.

She hears the soft crunch of rubber soles on gravel. Her mouth is as dry as the Sahara. She doesn't need to be a genius to know that danger is approaching. Thrusting her hands out, the mere motion sends a car flying, spinning into the air, until it finally lands, pinning several screaming mercenaries in place. Ellie gags, her breakfast lurching.

A sharp pain rips through her head. It feels like an axe has buried itself in her skull. A thick gush of blood trickles down her nose, into her mouth, and she wipes at the trickle with the edge of her sleeve. Lifting her weary eyes, Ellie's pain-tinged gaze falls on Deadpool, who leaps sideways and dives behind a rusty car in one bound. His eyes meet hers.

"Hey!" Ellie calls, waving a free hand at Deadpool. The words clump together in her mouth. "Over here!"

Dodging bullets, Deadpool sprints over to where Ellie is huddled, his voice sounding forcefully calm. "What's the plan, Negasonic Teenage Warhead?"

" _You_ – shut up. I've got this shit covered." Ellie grinds out, examining the scene. The soldiers on the ground level have been taken out, but more of them are perched atop the Helicarrier. There's a lift that can take them up, but the moment she sets eyes on it, visions of smoke and brimstone flash through her mind.

 _And there goes_ that _plan._

It's a good thing she has a Plan B.

"Okay, stairs. Picture the stairs. Stairs." Ellie repeats herself, over and over. Her eyes tightly shut, she pictures the massive curving staircase that stretches up to the second level on the X-Mansion. She remembers how the lights from below flicker through the banisters, creating leaping deer and round-eyed owls along the walls. Her breathing levels and she lets herself go deeper.

"Holy crap, that shit was B-A-N-A-N-A-S!"

At Deadpool's loud whoop of delight, Ellie's eyes fly open to behold a staircase made out of silvery blue energy. It seems solid enough, but the moment Deadpool slaps her on the back hard enough to make her teeth rattle, it flickers out of existence for a split second. Ellie thinks he looks apologetic underneath his mask, but it's hard to tell. She glares.

Standing, Ellie's legs buckle as a wave of dizziness floods her. She shoves Deadpool towards the stairs, which have been constructed out of psychic energy. "What are you waiting for? An invitation? _Go."_

Before she can protest, Deadpool grabs her arm and hauls her along, half dragging, half carrying her. Ellie stumbles along as best she can, her head spinning. She tries not to fall over. The ground is heaving up and down underneath her feet. There is only one thought looping through her mind: _Keep the stairs in place._ If not, both she and Deadpool will plummet to the ground in a sickly tangle of limbs. When her legs give out, Deadpool catches her as if he's used to catching fainting girls, as if he does it every day. Maybe he does. He swings her up into his arms, and they make it to the second floor just as the stairs melt away like a sugar cube in hot tea.

"You can put me down now." Ellie pointedly says to Deadpool. Her breath clouds the words in a chilly bubble.

"Fucker should've worn his brown pants," Deadpool mutters grouchily, setting her down near a large crate of cargo.

It's the male from the freeway. He's dressed in a grey T-Shirt, with black cargo pants and combat boots. Beside him, locked in a glass coffin like a modern-day Snow White is Vanessa. Tall and ribbon-slim, with a long spill of raven curls, she's dressed in a figure-hugging bandage dress complete with fishnets and garters. Mascara is smudged under her eyes, and sweat sticks the hair to her neck, but Deadpool is staring at her as though he might never see her again. A familiar feeling swamps her; it makes her feel light-headed and dizzy, as though she's drunk one of Wolverine's cans of beer. She's only ever felt that way when she's around . . .

 _He's in_ love _with her._

It's enough to make Ellie want to barf.

"You were right, beautiful," Deadpool calls out. "Red really is my color."

"Wade?" Vanessa whispers, and immediately, Ellie feels the terror that has been covering Vanessa recede like a tide going out.

Ellie sinks to the ground and lets the cold damp soak up the back of her legs. She feels like she's gone ten rounds with a T-Rex. She turns to the side and vomits. She tastes blood. Sweat beads along her face and arms. Ellie tips her head up to look at the sky and the clouds rushing past. Then her eyes flutter shut, and she drifts away, towards the oblivion of rest.


End file.
